We Need A Good Locksmith

• March 26, 2012
• CJ MADISON
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Article written by CJ MADISON

Been tryin' to get you to pay attention but, aint no point in beatin’ a dead horse… ’course, can’t hurt none neither.

We Need A Good Rule 5 Locksmith

This here's Arthur. Aurthur D. Akins. The "D" stanz fer Daniel. That's spelt D-A-N-I-E-L, Daniel but most folks call me Scooter ('cept momma - she always calls me Arthur, 'specially when she figgers I been up to no good).

Me 'n Bubba Joe was down to the boat ramp contemplatin' some of this world's goin's on when Bubba got all thoughtful and such. Seems Bubba Joe done locked his self out of the shed.

Now, Bubba Joe's shed ain't like most sheds here-bouts. It's almost built bettr'n our fishin' buddy, Bobbie Lynn here that day down to the lake — ain't near as pretty, tho. That girl make you take back things you never took! Reminds me of the time that fella come up here from Gableton thinkin' he was gonna be sweet-talkin' Bobbie. Shoot - that girl turned that boy every which way from Sunday and got him all tangled up in that trot-line.  It was near-to-painful just to watch. But that's another story.  Sorry, I'm gettin' off track - Bobbie gets me a bit distracted - She can do that to a fella. Watchin' that girl bait your hook is a sight to behold.

Back to the story ... 'peers Bubba was wantin' to get a few of his new Yum Wooly Beavertail lures for our fishin' trip over to Clark's Pond but like I said afor, he locked his self out of the shed. Bubba's shed got double 12-guage steel sides and it ain't like you can just take the chainsaw and cut yourself a new door like we did to the house last Thanksgiving.  Bubba said he might need to get aholt of Stoney, the locksmith over in Hardysville.

Locksmithin' is expensive. I ain't say'n Bubba's frugal mind you, but that boy still got his lunch money he got from Aunt Crystal back in the third grade, so's I said he should maybe get Lee Roy from back up beyond Ginnie's place. There ain't been a lock made that boy couldn't get around!. This is where Bubba Jo got to thinkin'.

"You know what", says Bubba. "Presidents is like locksmiths and locks is well, kinda like the Constitution. Take for example that fella, Reagan. He's like ol' Stoney. There was a president that know'd all about locks and what locks was for. You don't open the lock just so's you could get inside and take a fella's stuff. You had to open that lock real careful like, just so's you could make sure a man's stuff would stilll be in there all safe and sound when you was done. The man respected the lock."

We been talkin' about President Obama so when Bubba got all moody like, I figgered it best to let him keep waxing on. "Obama, well he's like Lee Roy. He knows all 'bout locks just as much as ol' Stoney do — maybe more, but he don't think much of locks.  They's just somethin' to get around to get to a man's tackle. He don't respect what a lock's for - it's just something gettin' in the way of things. Seems kinda odd that you can have two fellers that knows all about locks as much as the other one do but one man does you right and the other does you dirty. I'm guessin' it's all about a man's up-bringin'."

Me an' Bubba sat there on the boat ramp for a few minutes watching Bobbie Lynn get the Ranger all ready.  Boy, this was a pretty day for fishin'.  "Want I should go up to momma's and call Stoney?"  I asked.  Bubba kinda squinted down them big baby-blues and said, "Yep, — it might cost me more up front but at least I'll know my stuff'll be there when we gets back. Might want to check with momma too an' see if she got some fresh ice tea - looks like it's gonna be a hot one — an' don't forgit Bobbie Lynn's Hawaiian Tropic — I got dibs on first squeeze this time!"

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